And it doesn’t involve going to sleep for a really long time.
Jenny Chang / BuzzFeed
At The Sharing Place, children who have lost parents and other family members come together during bimonthly counselor-led group meetings to talk, heal, and get an understanding of what it means to die.
"I try to explain the cause of death using really basic terms that are developmentally appropriate for the child I'm speaking to," Jill Macfarlane, development director and child life specialist at The Sharing Place, tells BuzzFeed Life. Toddlers, for example, tend to grieve in energetic bursts because they have short attention spans. Explanations usually need to be short and frequent for them to stick.
Referring to dead animals or people as "asleep" can cause some kids to develop a fear of sleeping, and they might worry that they'll never wake up. "Kids are imaginative thinkers, so they can run wild with the idea of why someone is gone unless you explain it to them," Macfarlane says.
Also, it's possible to accurately explain death without sacrificing your religious beliefs. "If you believe in heaven, you can talk about what happens to the soul," Macfarlane says. "But we think that it's important for the child to understand that the body isn't working anymore — and some of them might want to know why."
Jenny Chang / BuzzFeed
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